A very Burnout birthday.

So, I know this is a month-plus late, but it is never too late to wish me a happy birthday, in case you’re so inclined.

Since we were leaving for Chicago a few days later, Red and I decided to keep my birthday observances simple. We headed to Great Sage for lunch, and if you are in the tri-state area and have not yet experienced Great Sage, clear your calendar and do it. When it was vegan-friendly, it was great; since going completely vegan in January, it has become amazing. It’s part of a little eco-friendly cluster of stores called Conscious Corner, which I think is cute. Roots is a natural-organic market, Bark! has pet food and toys, and Nest has all the pretty things you wish you could fit in your house. Theoretically, you could probably find everything you need at Conscious Corner. It would be expensive, but you could do it.

Now, on to the amazing.

Because we are pretzel fiends, we started with a soft pretzel. There was only one, but we shared it. It came with three yummy dipping sauces: hummus, honey mustard, and chili cheese. We ate it too fast for me to get a picture, but it was a pretzel, y’all. You can handle it.

While we were nomming our pretzel, we were entertained by the couple next to us. They reminded me of my parents. The lady half of the couple chilled out and pondered the menu, while her dude wrinkled his brow and fretted over the rabbit food on offer. He spent a few minutes trying to work out what “Daiya” was (I hope he wasn’t too disappointed), and by that time I felt bad for him and whispered to Red that maybe we should give him a hand, since his missus either didn’t care or was just as confused but not showing it. But we didn’t want to embarrass him, so we judged it kinder to let him fumble through on his own. Hope you survived, omni-man.

I spent quite a lot of time deciding what to have for lunch. Since I was feeling adventurous, I ordered the Southwest Ranch “Bacon” Wrap, which sweet fancy Moses did not disappoint. I don’t know what it was—the tempeh bacon, maybe—but everything in this wrap was in perfect harmony. It took an act of great will to avoid snarfing the second half, but we wanted to order dessert, so I restrained myself.


I think Red had the Grilled Reuben, as he is prone to having a Reuben whenever the opportunity presents itself. I didn’t photograph it, but trust me, it was a thing of beauty.

As you surely know, the most important part of any birthday meal is dessert. Usually I don’t have a lot of room for dessert, but I was determined to indulge. The dessert selection was big enough to have some variety, but small enough to not be overwhelming. After some haggling over who would order what (because we couldn’t order the same thing, as that would be boring), Red ordered the Strawberry Shortcake and I tackled the Chocolate Lava Cake with vanilla ice cream. It was coconut-milk ice cream, too, so you know it was badass. Just take a look:



I am lucky, because Red does not share my addiction to things chocolate. Unluckily for him, I love strawberries almost as much as he does, so he had to guard his shortcake carefully. Sweet man that he is, though, he let me have a taste. It was fantastic, but not as fantastic as the cake. It was like a dense little pot of heaven. Happy-mouth, happy-tummy heaven. But too much of a good thing is sometimes just too much, because try as I might, I only got about three-quarters of the way through before I had to concede defeat. You bested me, Chocolate Lava Cake, with the aid of your BFF Southwest Wrap. Next time, I’ll skip lunch and eat all of you.


It was a happy birthday, indeed.