Fruity oaty awesome, or how I learned to stop worrying and love parchment paper.

I am a breakfast kinda girl. I have to be, because without it I either throw up or pass out. While either of those can be a serviceable ending to a hella fun evening, I prefer to start my mornings off with a little less excitement.

Anyway, breakfast. Cereal and PBJ on toast are both delicious options, but I found myself getting bored. I wanted an easy breakfast that was filling yet tasty and didn’t involve hauling out the pots and pans at 6:00 am. Imagine my delight when my newly acquired Vegan Cookies Invade Your Cookie Jar featured an entire chapter full of healthy, won’t-give-you-a-sugar-high cookies!

I settled on making Fruity Oaty Bars, and they did not disappoint. I was a little leery at first, because the recipe calls for both brown rice syrup and barley malt syrup, but the bars aren’t too sweet at all (or sticky, which is a problem with some granola bars). They don’t jack up my blood sugar, either. The benefits of using unrefined sugar, represent. They were very easy to make, with the only minor annoyance being chopping the dried apples. But whatever, you’re probably tougher than I am and don’t mind hacking through desiccated fruit. After that, it’s a veritable orgy of mixing and smushing and squishing everything into a baking pan before shoving it into the oven and digging oatmeal out from under your fingernails. Half an hour or so later, you have 16 delicious little breakfasts waiting for you.

What’s in here? Apples, cranberries, ground flax, sesame seeds, pepitas, oats, cinnamon....

For my first batch, I stuck close to the recipe and only used apples and cranberries, which seemed like a safe combo. The second time around, I found some stray dried blueberries, maybe a quarter-cup, and tossed those in as well. They added a nice little something, so if you like blueberries, go for it. I’m sure they’d be extra-awesome with chocolate chips, but that might skew away from the wholesome aspect.

Here’s where my newfound obsession with parchment paper comes in. For batch #1, I lined the pan with my old standby, aluminum foil. It worked fine. I always thought that parchment paper was an extravagance I didn’t need; after all, what could it possibly do that foil couldn’t do better and, well, shinier? I like shiny. Ask my husband. Still, we ended up buying parchment paper out of curiosity and I gave it a try with batch #2. You probably already know this, my lovelies, but it is SO WORTH IT. You don’t have to grease anything. It’s amazing. It’s so easy. It’s even compostable. Once your bars have cooled, just lift that paper out of there and you’re good to go. Parchment paper, I love you. I even suspect that I can reuse you after baking non-greasy cookies, like dog treats.

Um, so evidently I have kind of a thing for parchment paper now, but you’ve always known I was a little weird. These tasty little granola bars are incredible, and you should make them. (Hint: Search on Google Books. Maybe that’s cheating, I don’t know. Take it up with Google.) I thought a single bar wouldn’t fill me up, but it totally does. I’ve given the recipe to two omni coworkers, both of whom are stoked to try them.

Best of all, they are perfect with coffee. Good morning, indeed.

Chocolate-marshmallow granola bars.

Do you like chocolate? Of course you do. Marshmallows? I know you like those as well. Would you like to eat them both at the same time, without the messiness of s’mores, and be at least kind of convinced that they are healthy for you?

Once upon a time, Red and I found ourselves with too many Sweet & Sara’s marshmallows. Unbelievably, there is such a thing. I love s’mores, but I was getting tired of making them every. single. night. I needed help. Kelly @ easyVegan helped me. Her recipe for Chewy Chocolate Marshmallow Granola Bars is here, and you should hoard all the chocolate and marshmallows you can find so you can make a massive batch of these and eat nothing else ever ever again.

These granola bars are ridiculously easy to make, and because they contain four cups of oatmeal, they are totally healthy for you. (Well, okay, I suppose it depends on your definition of “totally,” but I’m not your nutritionist, so there.) The hardest part was chopping up the marshmallows. I used our kitchen scissors, but the marshmallows were sticky and gummed them up. Regardless, my hand got a workout and the marshmallows were eventually sliced into small little niblets of sugary awesome. To make sure they stayed that way and didn’t glom into one huge monster ‘mallow when I mixed them into the granola, I tossed them with a little flour first. This is an excellent baking tip that my mom taught me, and it works for suspending anything you don’t want to sink to the bottom of your dough or batter.

Then it was into the pan with everything, extra chocolate chips sprinkled on top, and into the oven at 425°.

Ahem. Did you click over to easyVegan for the recipe yet? Because if you did, you may have noticed that these little beauties are supposed to be baked at 325°, not 425°. I overshot the temperature by a hundred fuckin’ degrees.

Happily, this potential epic fail ended happily. After 20 minutes in the superheated oven (which, we have recently realized, runs about 50 degrees cool), the granola bars smelled like heaven and looked divine. It took our combined willpower to let them cool before slicing into them.


The verdict? We shouldn’t have given as many bars away to our friends and coworkers. (It was a particularly sneaky form of vegan advocacy.) Damn our generosity! They were so incredible that we easily could have eaten the entire pan. I should have pre-melted the chocolate chips that I scattered on top (they stayed pretty solid), but that was our only snafu. The marshmallows were a perfect addition, and the oatmeal made the bars so hearty that I was satisfied after only a few bites.

In conclusion: Make these. But don’t have me pre-heat your oven.

Blueberry-pomegranate nibbles.

I think we can all agree that homemade is better, right? But what's a hungry vegan to do when she's on the go and can't always get to the kitchen, or wants to keep healthy snacks in her desk at work? I submit to you my solution: Mareblu Naturals Blueberry Pomegranate Trail Mix Crunch.

Now, that is a hella long name for a snack that is, when we get right down to it, granola bites. And don't worry, I'm not selling out to Mareblu and showering them with praise in exchange for kickbacks. (Though, if they're reading....) The stuff is just that good. Red and I were wandering around Costco one day, and I found these in the impulse aisle. You know the one I mean—it's right near the front, and it's got all the candy and chocolate and pretzels. Usually, nothing good lurks there. But the Mareblu Trail Mix Crunch must have been new, so they were pushing it hard.

I may have kicked up my heels a little when I read "100% Vegan" on the back of the bag. They're also gluten-free, wheat-free, and peanut-free (though certainly not tree-nut free). They don't have too much sugar or salt. Best of all, I can eat a handful—and my hands are small—and quiet my stomach's desperate whining. A coworker tried some, and immediately ordered me back to Costco to pick up a bag for her as well. (I did. She paid me.)

They are tasty little cubes of nomniness (Kelly @ easyVegan, I told you I was going to steal that!). That's all.

Photo ripped from Mareblu Naturals. Don't sue me after all the sunshine I just blew up your ass.